From the article: OCD and Romantic Relationships
If you have OCD, you know that your symptoms can often get in the way of establishing and maintaining romantic relationships. Indeed, many individuals with OCD are single and those who are in a relationship or are married often report a significant amount of relationship stress. How has your OCD impacted your romantic relationships?
OCD and Love
- My SO and I have been together for about 8 months now. I love him VERY much. Not only does he suffer from OCD/PTSD, along with some relatioship/commitment issues but we are 500 miles apart! This makes our relationship very difficult at times. We are both looking for jobs to help us close the distance but the last month has been VERY rough. His OCD has been bad and he is struggling with feeling overwhelmed by household chores. He struggles with cleaning, doing laundry, and dishes because he is convinced he won't get them clean enough or if he does then he'll just turn around and dirty them again, making him feel guilty that he "failed" to keep them clean. I am supportive and understanding but sometimes his issues can reak havock on my feelings and really confuse me.
- —Guest soinlovebutconfused
rosy
- I am divorced after a 17 yr marriage. I keep finding that I meet a half decent guy and I self sabatoge myself and end it before they dump me. I am so afraid of rejection and deep down I'm afraid and I ruin the relationship first so I'm not the one getting hurt. I feel crazy sometimes.
- —Guest rosy
Swear on people's lives
- Who are you - I would like nothing better than to speak with you. We are in the same boat.
- —Guest Rick
His OCD Destroying Our Relationship
- I've been seeing this guy for 6 months who treats me good, very affectionate, chemistry, intimacy amazing, and lots in common. always have great times together. Couple months into he starts telling me he's not sure if I'm the one. We continued to date, cause it was so early in the relationship to determine that. He brings it up again, each time we'd break up for couple weeks. I'm an emotional wreck:( Now it's been 3 weeks (his father passed away during this time), and shrink tells him not to see me for 2 more wks so he can clear his head. He can't sleep, and struggling with dad's passing). I've been there to support him through this while trying to figure out why he's doubting us. He finally admitted(therapist said to) that my teethcolor & eyebrows keep him up nights worrying because he thinks they need to get fixed & that he's attracted to women who take care of themselves. Was hurt bcause I'm attractive @ 42 bcause I do take care of myself. I don't want to lose him over OCD. Help??
- —healthnfit
My experience
- Since i was a teenager ive always have problems because of my OCD , so usually girls dump me too soon cause they thought i was too "hard" to understand,now im 35 and the problem still remains cause normally it cause me too much stress everything (the fact to make the plan to pick her up i.e)and im still thinking all the time that nothing is good enough and most of the time i think only me can bear with the things on my mind, cause girls now usually thinks im "complicated" but i cant really help it,.. i try my best but usually i recognize i "ruin" things, i wish i could have a normal relationship,..
- —Guest The guy
Partners with OCD
- I've started going out with a guy with OCD. We've been together for short period of time. He is constantly questioning my past and makes me swear on peoples lives because he think I am lying - I love him but I don't know how to handle it.
- —Guest little me
It controlled everything...
- I don not have OCD, it was my partner. It drove him from being a happy, perfect man into controlling and mentally abusive. It was the most terrifying thing to see someone I love to be crippled down to nothing by his own mind, and that along with our relationship. I am 19 and telling his parents the things he worried about and how close he was to killing himself because he couldn't NOT do the rituals them was scary. It drove our relationship to an end, destroying all the trust and love he had because he could not fight against his own mind. I was with him every step of the way and even on into his therapy, becoming closer that any of his family and friends, understanding him, and helping him get better. I am now single, but hope and pray everyday that he gets better and is able to live a normal life.
- —petuniamax
OCD Spectrum-Trich
- Trich is compulsive hair pulling. I suffered from this for years. Plus, other issues. I have been married 3 times. Up until my 3rd husband, I unconsciously chose mates who kept a certain amount of distance and who were emotionally distant and self centered. So, I never told them about my disorder. I wore makeup ALL the time. A big turning point was when I went to therapy for panic attacks and was put on Effexor XR. The compulsiveness of "having to" pull my eyelashes out was gone! It was something I could control. Then, I was recently diagnosed with BP II/learning to cope with this disease has improved the Trich even more. I'm in complete remission. I have eyelashes, eyebrows and not one little bald spot on my head. My current husband is the only one I have discussed this problem. He was very understanding. But, now it's a non-issue because of medication, sleeping schedule,relaxation,healthy eating-all I learned to help my BP II symptoms.
- —FreakyandProud
OCD
- OCD can be torture, burdened with worries that other people never have to the same degree, feeling tainted and wrong - but focusing on your passions may be helpful. For me, these are taking a BA and MA English, living life fully, all the other things OCD tries prevent you doing - do em! Don't let OCD rule your life or stop you achieving what you want - get on with things, life is too short. Nothing bad happens if you ignore obsessions and Prozac can help. The people I love give me the strength and motivation to beat it. There is no cure so I want live with it, like arthritis, or a bad back, uncomfortable but doesn't have to cripple me - be happy!
- —Guest KM
Buttercup
- Hi, I have OCD and its very hard to have a relationship. Me and my bf are constantly fighting and I am getting worn out with this compulsive disorder. Its embarrassing and am 28 and my mum doesn't even no. My bf does, but doesn't know what to do to help me, as I don't myself.I feel crazy and I'm at my wits end.
- —Guest buttercup
relationships and ocd
- I am in my third marriage and all I can say is this time around I was the most honest I have ever been in my life. I have no clue why I feel such a safety net with my husband of almost 1 yr {2yr} relationship. I feel something I have never felt before. I have two of the most amazing, understanding daughter's; both are well aware of what I have and accept me unconditionally. They are my true strength. I think with time and my age which is 36 has helped a lot, Trust me it is still hard and everyday is a constant battle, but by the grace of God I have been able to grow with this disorder through good times and bad and still have two daughter's and now two more. With my husband's understanding I can still be myself. Trust me, I know it is not easy for him or the girls but for all of us we'll make it as a team.
- —Guest nutsrus
still worrying, maybe even wilting?
- One of my first poignant moments was when I was 17 years old with my first love many moons ago. He noticed me staring back at the sidewalk that we were walking on and responded by yelling and criticizing my behaviors. Little did he know that I was counting the number of squares on the sidewalk to make sure that it did not sum up to a "bad number". I always thought I could camouflage what I believed to be my secretive "quirks". Eventually, my OCD magical thinking and "just right" rituals started to consume me. I wish I could be in the moment while meeting and being with others. Needless to say, this has presented a barrier in maintaining relationships. In bed, my most recent ex-bf would feel my arm twitch by him during an OCD ritual and exclaim, "What are you doing?!" I'd feel mortified, much too embarrassed to say that I was ritualizing. Counting the number of letters in the words that I say has stifled my romantic livelihood. So here I am, single.
- —worryflower
